All alone with my shadow For far too long I have been swallowed up Only my shadow remains Empty shoes where I used to stand A formless fraud Pretending myself into being Laughing, crying, raging Anything to feel alive So so tired now Yet unable to find solace in sleep Peace evades me I keep getting back up After each knock down I can’t seem to help it My longing for love is greater than my sorrow The seductive void calls to me Trust, trust, trust… My mantra Will the light return? Or have I finally been extinguished? Sweet surrender is where I’ll find my bliss.
“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.” ― Rumi
“When you realise there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” ~Lao Tzu
This morning, as I embark on this 53rd trip around the sun, I am filled with so many beautiful and intense emotions.
I am literally in tears…
for all those who have touched my heart and left my life;
for all those who will always remain in my heart that I love so much;
for all the blessings bestowed on me and finally being able to received them all with open arms;
for all the healing work I’ve done these past few years, in particular, that have now led to this fertile and lush garden of bliss;
for all the hurt and betrayal that has really shown me how incredibly strong and brave I am and has actually opened my heart & up-levelled my compassion, making me softer and kinder;
for stepping into a life free from old narratives and negative storylines which used to have me hustling for my worth with crazy busyness and performing;
for releasing from my life all those incapable of seeing past their shadow and meeting me in the heart space;
for having the courage to embrace my shadow and letting the light touch it gently, illuminating where I still need to send some love and tenderness;
for all the amazing opportunities to love deeper, laugh harder, play and dance with abandon, grab hold of my passion with both hands & never letting go, and to be of divine service to all beings;
and for truly trusting that I am loved, supported and blessed.
I just can’t wait to see what the Universe has in store for me next….
“The minute I heard my first love story, I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along.” ~Rumi
You entered my sunlit dreams
offering your heart
so open and warm
I melted into you
So steady and sure
you held onto me
with a strength that calmed my fear
Your devious charm
seducing me
with belly laughs
and innuendo
Your voice
your moans
the way you sigh my name
lights a fire inside me
Throwing caution to the wind
with eyes and hearts open
allowing our souls to find their way back together
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