Tag Archives: integrity

COMING UNDONE

my heart

shattered in pieces

unrecognisable

broken open

*

the fight of my life

freedom comes at a cost

but my soul is not for sale

*

feeling alone in union

is its own kind of prison

swallowed up in another’s orbit

powerless and afraid

*

breaking free was my salvation

a new world opened

a different kind of terror

*

my broken heart

displayed on the altar

proof I had the courage to love

a testament of faith

*

years of battle

finding my voice 

discovering my worth 

beyond the hustle for validation

*

aging in reverse

freed from the burden of a life

not meant for me

too small to contain my spirit

*

love without strings

love that feels like freedom

love that opens the heart

and quiets the mind

love without cruelty

love that gives more than it takes

*

my ravaged heart

once emptied by thieves

now ravished by love

full

content

whole

*

seeing only bliss 

where once was fear

harmony

where once was chaos

liberation

where once was captivity

*

blessed beyond measure

loved and held sacred

in divinity and pleasure

*

coming undone

rebuilt anew

every cell of my being

activated

by the magic of you. 

*

Run away with me

A portal has opened 

my heart

my appetite

my senses

all vibrating 

a craving

an unquenched thirst

a longing for more

discomfort in vulnerability 

resisting the withdrawal 

blissful moments

playing on my mind

shadow and light

peace and anger

love and cruelty

am i brave enough

to trust 

to stand strong

and face the winds of change 

to be ravished

held sacred

to lay down my fear and armour

stand naked in truth

come to me in my dreams

claim me

hold on tenderly

yet fiercely

there is loneliness in freedom

walking an unfamiliar path

i can’t move forward 

if i’m looking back

the light shines bright

at the end of the tunnel

finally hopeful

free of heartache and regret 

integrity and courage my guides 

we need only know the why

the how works itself out

in divine alignment

run away with me

into the wondrous unknown

where pleasure and adventure awaits

💖💖💖

Forgiveness

forgiveness

such a sweet, tender gift

we give ourselves

lost in blame,

shame and bitterness

we lose our capacity for love

love cannot flourish

when hatred is present

contempt blocks and binds

our spirits

embrace the sadness

that lies beneath our sacred anger

a broken heart

is an open heart

savour the blessings

of pain

our greatest teacher

see our hurt

mirrored by others

do not hold tightly to suffering

do not curl up with it

like a warm blanket

that comforts and soothes

rather it obscures

a sticky illusion

trapping us

preventing our ascension

there is no bounty in grasping

clinging to righteousness

which leaves our hands full

unable to receive love

there is much work to do

to unravel what is ours to hold

and what to hand back to another

release what is not yours

there is no bypass

no avoidance offered

the only way past

is through

sit with the discomfort

learn the art

of beautiful boundaries

an act of love

for ourselves and others

hold your truth

and another’s

with compassion

both are messengers

delivering wisdom

do not get lost in the storylines

the symptoms

the excuses

journey within

seek the source

the ancient scar

that sits beneath our anger

where do we need to heal

to apply the medicine of love

release fear

so we can forgive

find the wound

touch the tender sadness

hold ourselves in a gentle embrace

no judgement

of how we choose to heal

pain is a sacred invitation

a gift of the heart

lean in

let go

allow love to transform

move freely

like a powerful tide

ebbing and flowing

nourishing

in the words of Sarah Blondin:

“breathe

be

receive

breathe

be

receive

breathe

be

receive”

🙏🏻

The Wounding

“Your word travels the entirety of space and reaches my cells which are my stars then goes to yours which are my light.”

~Frida Kahlo

I thought my heart irrevocably broken

That I would never again feel whole

Each shattered piece

Piercing

Bleeding

A hurt so intense

I thought I might die

When you kiss my wound

It stings

The delicious pain

Of being brought back to life

Will I ever trust again?

Betraying myself

Trying to love someone too broken to receive it

Am I too broken now to receive your love?

I sprinkled my wounds

With fairy dust and sparkles

Pretended to be fierce

Beyond reach

To those who sought to harm me

The same who once claimed to love me

Still…

The arrow got through

My armour disguised as enlightenment

True love doesn’t require an armouring

Does it?

But what do I know of true love…

I only know betrayal

Lies and deceit

Frost bite

Disguised as affection

Abandonment

Disguised as support

Bullying

Disguised as protection

And then you come along

Tending to all my wounds

With such delicate care and devotion

So gentle and reverent

You hold my heart

Tenderly

I push you away

Again and again

Yet you remain steadfast

And dedicated

Courageous and strong

Afraid of losing you

I ran away

Before another wounding

Another devastating loss

That would surely destroy me this time

We were destined

To find our way back together

To traverse this love

This life

Hand in hand

Healing each other

Along the way

I can shed my heavy armour

Finally

You remind me

Of who I am

Underneath all the wounds

Of my strength

My courage

My capacity for love

You know heartbreak and betrayal

Intimately

Yet you love with such stubborn loyalty

Showing me my heart is safe in your hands

I thought I knew what love was

I had every exact detail written in stone

What a fool I was

Loving and embracing

each other’s and our own perfect imperfections

Trusting each other to hold our vulnerability

A life of

Intense soul shifting passion

Deep belly laughs into the wee hours of dawn

Blissful sleep wrapped in each others arms

Sexy adventures

Sharing our hopes and dreams

Our pain and fears

Growing in truth

Falling deeper in love

Every single day

Challenging each other to

Evolve

Transcend

Release stale versions

Of who we became

After so much wounding

I have finally found my home

In you

In us

And I am here to stay.

Because of you…

“The minute I heard my first love story,
I started looking for you, not knowing
how blind that was.
Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere.
They’re in each other all along.” ~Rumi

You entered my sunlit dreams

offering your heart

so open and warm

I melted into you

So steady and sure

you held onto me

with a strength that calmed my fear

Your devious charm

seducing me

with belly laughs

and innuendo

Your voice

your moans

the way you sigh my name

lights a fire inside me

Throwing caution to the wind

with eyes and hearts open

allowing our souls to find their way back together

We have loved each other

for eons

reconnecting with so much ease

letting the How unfold

as it is meant to

Our illusion of control

destiny laughs at us

no point in resistance

the stars are aligned

My healing heart

bursting open

ready to receive

the magic of you

I want to hide

drawing into myself

you seek me out

pulling me closer

I am braver

because of you

I am stronger

because of you

you are my sanctuary

You lift me up

hold me tight

blow my wings open

launching me free

Always flying back to you

where I belong

tether me

to your heart

Side by side

we journey together

great adventures await us

growing and glowing

You are my forever

my light

my love

always

Falling in love

falling in love with life again

the rawness of the wounds healing

endless possibilities

laid out before me

a return to love

remembrance of my strength

beauty

trust

no need to hustle for my worth

nothing more to prove

I see clearly now

standing naked in the moonlight

surrounded by electricity

sensuality

a lust for life

my appetite returned

no more starvation

a feast upon me

I am whole

feel my passion

I am yours

but never owned

possess me

but don’t control

I am water

grasping can’t hold me

swim beside me

bathe deep inside

soak me into your consciousness

I will be forever

on your mind

you can’t let me go

I am a part of you now

What if….?

“What if we choose love… every. single. time?

What would the world look like then?” ~Jana Joy

What if we love as much as we’re capable of loving, even if it falls short of other’s expectations or needs?

What if our insecurities and fears are the cause of our harmful behaviour and has nothing to do with others?

What if we act out just because we are hurting?

What if forgiveness for all the hurt we cause each other is a blessing that will open our hearts to loving ourselves and others more deeply?

What if we are so desperate to prove our worth by “doing” in order to hide from our feelings of worthlessness that we just can’t see another way?

What if being asked to open our hearts and rise is simply out of our capacity right now?

What if what we truly need is something we can find within ourselves and we don’t need to look to others for it?

What if our suffering is so immense, we just need to hide for a bit to feel safe?

What if we simply lack the skills to navigate through our own painful emotions so cannot hold space for others in pain?

What if we stopped judging ourselves and others for how we show up in our pain and just had compassion instead?

What if we acknowledge we are all doing the very best we can when faced with difficult circumstances?

What if we stopped begrudging ourselves and others what little relief we can find in whatever ways we can find it, even if we don’t agree on each other’s methods?

What if the actions of others, their beliefs, opinions and harsh words have nothing to do with us and are merely reflections of their own heart that may broken, closed or healing from trauma?

What if the same is exactly true for us?

What if our fear of starting over is what causes us to behave in hurtful ways?

What if our true value is no longer defined by others?

What if we just gave thanks for the gifts in our lives that are here because of all the pain we’ve faced and overcome?

What if setting ourselves free is our greatest act of self love and inspires others to do the same?

What if we stopped looking backward and started focussing on all the blessings here, right now, and what is on its way to us?

What if we stopped clinging to old habits, to things, to ideas, to people that only weigh us down and prevent our ascension?

What if we placed all of our attention on the incredible life that awaits us when we let go of the storylines that threaten to destroy us?

What if we remember our divine “why” and followed our hearts instead of our minds?

What if we choose love… every. single. time?

What would the world look like then?